Emerald City 206, BAD ShEvil Dead 102

Emerald City 206, BAD ShEvil Dead 102 Emerald City blocker Rex Havoc serves as an anchor for Elizabeth Baumwirt's truck-and-trailer hit on ShEvil Dead jammer Sweet Thunder while simultaneously providing a whip to Emerald City jammer Jala Pain Yo. Photo: Jeff Boerio.

EUGENE, OR. – In a non-sanctioned bout against the Bay Area Derby Girls home-team ShEvil Dead, the 12W Emerald City all-star Skatesaphrenics used strong pack control to pile on the points during the many trips ShEvil Dead jammers took to the box. Despite keeping their penalty box crowded with blockers, Emerald City dominated from start to finish winning 206-102.

The ShEvil Dead had a very short-lived lead to start the bout. After Al Gory, ShEvil Dead’s top scorer with 49 points and 11 leads in 14 jams, opened on a 1-0 jam, the ShEvil Dead led 5-4 after two jams — but the damaging power jams soon put Emerald City in control. A couple jams later, Surly Q racked up a 15-0 frame to put the score at 24-5 when ShEvil Dead jammer Trixie Pixie cut the track. A couple more jams later, Freddie Bruiser committed a major cut allowing Emerald City jammer-in-zombie-makeup Bullet Brains to tally the bout’s highest-scoring jam, 24-7. Bullet led all jammers with 86 points.

This put the score at 48-20 with 16 minutes to go in the half. Emerald City was able to build upon their lead for the remainder of the half, but the ShEvil Dead avoided any more major point hemorrhaging. The halftime score stood at 86-48.


Lead Jams: 22
Power Jams: 8
Jam Wins: 19

Bullet Brains 9-11, 86 pts
Jala Pain Yo 4-9, 43 pts
Grace Golden 4-10, 32 pts
Terrin Skirtz 1-2, 29 pts
Medusa Harm 1-2, 10 pts
Betty Aim Fire 3-7, 6 pts
Rex Havoc 0-1, 0 pts
Elizabeth Baumwirt 0-1, 0 pts


Lead Jams: 22
Power Jams: 2
Jam Wins: 17

Al Gory 11-14, 49 pts
Trixie Pixie 6-14, 41 pts
Freddie Bruiser 1-1, 7 pts
Sweet Thunder 2-9, 3 pts
Luv U. Longtime 2-3, 2 pts
Tarah Bishop 0-2, 0 pts

The second half was all Emerald City. The first 25 minutes were nothing short of complete Skatesaphrenic dominance. They outscored the ShEvil Dead 91-23 during this stretch to put the game out of reach. Notable during this run were power jams of 20-0 and 22-0 by Bullet Brains and Jala Pain Yo respectively. During this sequence, key ShEvil Dead blocker Bunny Utah was ejected on gross misconduct for obscene language. The ShEvil Dead were able to put up 31 points in the final five minutes, but it really did nothing except make the score look a little nicer. The final was 206-102.

“I’m really proud of our girls. We had a lot of people step up considering the circumstances,” ShEvil Dead bench coach Miss Moxxxie said after the bout. “We were missing seven skaters [due to travel team bouts in Denver] and had to draw from other B.A.D. Girl home teams.” Miss Moxxxie herself was among the missing players, having injured herself doing yoga earlier in the week.

“Our toolbox drills really paid off,” Emerald City come-hither-bearded coach Izzy Wright said. “Our blockers spent a lot of time in the box, but the fact that we pair up in practice for our toolbox drills really helped us maintain the advantage.”

Emerald City next travels down to Arizona May 5th and 6th to take on 13W Arizona Roller Derby and 10W Tucson Roller Derby. The ShEvil Dead’s next bout is May 12 against fellow Bay Area home team Richmond Wrecking Belles.