Actually Hurt Hurt Reynolds

Totally off-topic for DNN, but enquiring minds need to know: Some of you are wondering what this image is all about.

If you’ve met me, you’ll know I’m a very unlikely harbinger of death. From any direction. Particularly from above. I lack, as some might say, the Dropbear Nature.

So it’s like this: a few weeks ago, the least intelligent of our three cats managed to strand himself in the attic/crawl space of our house. He’s terribly sweet, but even more terribly scaredy; once he’s up there, there is No. Way. he’s coming down on his own.

After a couple days of ceiling cat mewling, I headed up into the crawl space with a spray bottle to try to flush him out. Taking great care to step on only structural elements, like joists, and this board here that’s bridging those to joists, I aaaiiieeeAAAIIIIGHGH!

… I found myself flat on the carpet, inches from the kitchen tile, mere feet from an incredibly startled Mercy Less, who of course abandoned the morning waffle mission to call 911.

Ambulance led to stitches in a lacerated leg, X-rays led to MRIs to diagnose a compression fracture of a lower vertebra, back brace and Percocet see me home to try not moving for a while. Two days later, a spine specialist shot me up with epidural steroids to knock back the inflammation.

Right around here is where Rev. Norb suggested the Airborne homage.

To the surprise of no one, demands for stickers and tshirts rang out from across the land. It’s a limited edition — we will stop accepting orders after March 31st. Thanks to skateGEEK.com for production and fulfillment!

Cue happy ending. My lacerated leg is healing nicely. I’ve needed nothing stronger than ibuprofen since the epidural. I have a followup with Spine Guy in a week to see if any further work is needed. I’m in a back brace for at least three months, which is a hassle, but, damn. I could’ve broken my neck and died. We feel very, very lucky.

Ceiling cat? Dumbass stayed up there for a solid week.